I owe this one to some fool who has started a money-making operation out of Wyoming and Montana selling baby exotic animals through a Facebook page, and various dodgy online sites.
Many of these baby exotics are said to originate from the several game farms in the area that specialize in providing semi-tame animals for so-called nature photographers to bag otherwise hard-to-get shots.
Naturally — no pun intended — the outrage has been loud, emotional and voluminous, i.e. lengthy and full.
Almost inevitably, some commenters have complained that their comments taken down, as fast as they can post them, and their accounts blocked.
Here’s an inconvenient truth: As tempting — and cathartic — as it is to rattle off angry 500-word screeds about how awful the perpetrators of these crimes are, it’s all-too-easy for the offender to delete a comment with a single click, and then click ‘Block User.’
Humour, on the other hand — as anyone who’s read Kurt Vonnegut knows — tends to be short, to-the-point, witty and cutting, when used effectively.
Also, and I’m not sure why this is, dumb people often have a hard time telling if the comment is genuine or if they’re being had. Parody can be so hard to spot, if one’s not used to it.
As issues go, the climate crisis and species extinction are serious, but all that seriousness can seem a little one-note at times. If one isn’t careful, it’s easy to allow one’s energy to flag. A reality check, no matter how real, can have the opposite of its intended effect if it seems tired and predictable.
Here goes, then — some of my favourite memes, witty ripostes and fast ’n furious comebacks about the serious issues of climate change, species extinction and environmental ruin.
“If I were ever abducted by aliens, the first thing I’d ask is whether they came from a planet where people also deny science.”
Neil deGrasse Tyson, on Twitter.
“Alien: ‘Why should I not blow up this planet?’
“Human: ‘We are an advanced species.’
“Alien: ‘How do you travel?’
“Human: ‘We light old dinosaurs on fire.’”
John Biehl, on Twitter.
What, you didn’t appreciate J.K. Rowling enough already? Try this on for size, then:
“The existence of Twitter is forever validated by the following exchange:
“Katie Mack: ‘Honestly, climate change scares the heck out of me, and it makes me so sad to see what we’re losing because of it.’
“Gary P Jackson: ‘Maybe you should learn some actual SCIENCE then, and stop listening to the criminals pushing #GlobalWarming SCAM!’
“Katie Mack: [crickets]”
J.K. Rowling, on Twitter.
And this one, an online climate change meme that doubles as a shout-out to the 1993 Bill Murray movie Groundhog Day:
“Only in America do we accept weather predictions
from a rodent, but deny climate change evidence from scientists.”
Or this one, from humorist and late-night comedian John Oliver:
“One in four Americans is skeptical about climate change. . . . Who gives a (damn)? That doesn’t matter. You don’t need people’s opinions on fact. You might as well have a poll asking which number is bigger, 5 or 15? Or, do owls exist? Or, are there hats?”
And this, from another celebrity actor-comedian:
“The US leads the world in people who think climate science is fake, but pro wrestling is real.”
And these, from ordinary, everyday people, just regular folks:
“You know it’s serious when the introverts show up.”
Climate campaigner Deborah Elizabeth Finn, on Twitter
“We also have science to thank for ‘beer’ and ‘no polio.’”
Climate campaigner Anja Hoffman, on Twitter
And finally, this, from the former Leader of the Free World, at a 2014 midterm campaign rally at Wayne State University in Detroit, Mich:
“Ask a Republican about climate change and he’ll say, ‘I’m not a scientist!’ But when it comes to a woman’s right to choose, suddenly they all become doctors.”
It’s funny because it’s true.